These Monsters are Real
There are monsters in your head.
At this time of year we tend to think the only monsters are the ones that go door to door asking for candy or dress up in elaborate costumes for adult parties.
But those monsters are nothing compared to the one’s that live in our head all year.
I’m talking about the monster you allow to berate and degrade you, feed you insecurities, lead you toward addictive behaviors and generally wreck havoc on your emotional, physical and spiritual well-being. No Hollywood or costume monster can hold a candle to the one that lives rent free in your mobile loft.
So what can you do to tame that beast?
Be kind to your monster. What, be kind you say? Shouldn’t I just bombard it with grenades, flame-throwers and nuclear missiles? Chances are you have already tried that. All those options, which are awesome if you a Marvel superhero attacking an external threat, are completely counterproductive for internal threats. So be kind to that inner critic. After all it’s really only trying to keep you “safe” but in a very ineffective way. Yelling back is only a temporary solution. Disarm your critic with lovingkindness.
Be more aware. Autopilot is great for airplanes flying long distances, and someday for self-driving cars, but not for emotional regulation. Awareness allows to see and hold what’s happening in a nonjudgmental way. From that space you have a chance to grow and liberate yourself from habitual negative reactions.
Learn to mediate. Mindfulness meditation is a powerful tool to address your monsters. It’s not a woo-woo hocus pocus kind of thing. Repeated sessions of meditation gives you the opportunity to practice seeing your thoughts from a different perspective, accepting what has already happened, expressing gratitude for what you have, and letting go of thoughts and feelings that don’t serve you. It helps build resilience for the days the monster’s had more to eat than usual. What you practice while meditating spills over into the rest of your day when you need it most.
Learning these skills takes practice and guidance. Some people benefit from engaging with a coach, (or licensed addiction therapist if necessary). No need to carry them around with you. I can help you find the superpowers that are already inside you to vanquish your monsters.