(This is an updated version 10/27/2020)

Embrace the suck. It’s a military phrase that means, “the situation’s bad, deal with it.”

Closed schools, cancelled sport leagues, empty restaurants and businesses, social distancing— the woes go on and on and seem to increase by the hour. I think we can all agree, this sucks.

But I want you to embrace it. “What?!!”

Yes. I want you to take the military phrase a bit farther than simply “deal with it.”

Embrace it. Wrap your arms around the suck and pull it close. Dance with it.

OR, you could continue to resist the reality on the ground (and in the air). Let’s do a little math shall we? Oh come on, it’s not as hard as your kids’ stuff. Here it is:

SUFFERING = PAIN X RESISTANCE

Pain, is a part of life. We have a nervous system hardwired to detect it. If we didn’t, and some people actually are born without the ability to feel physical pain, it would be life-threatening. Pain tells us “Danger Will Robinson, Danger! (or maybe some other name). But it’s a message that’s clear and concise: Do Something!

SUFFERING IS DIFFERENT

Suffering, well now, that’s where it gets interesting. You see although we are designed to detect pain, that suffering stuff is a whole different part of the nervous system. And here’s the thing about suffering—totally optional. Yep, that part is not anywhere in the contract, not even the small print. I’ll say it again. Totally optional.

“What are you crazy Mark? I broke my arm and suffered for weeks!”. Hmmm, I wondered why you chose to do that imaginary person? Let’s break it down (pun intended). You broke your arm, ok got that. Then what did you do? Did you say “OMG now I can’t feed myself!” and “OMG I’ll be malnourished and have a weakened immune system!” and OMG “I’ll starve to death!” and, and…. Because every one of those OMGs was all about suffering.

USE YOUR SUPER POWER

Here’s a secret. We all have a superpower. It’s called reframing. You get to chose how you want to interpret life events and circumstances. No one forces you to hold thoughts in your head, you choose them. Now let’s be kind because they come honestly, based on a lifetime of experiences, values, prejudices, beliefs and needs of the moment, but they are in fact, chosen.

So you can choose to think something else. You can choose to accept that your arm is broken. Remember the equation? I know you remember this much from 2nd grade math. Anything x zero = zero. If your resistance is zero, so is the suffering.

Anywhere there is tension in your body it’s usually a sign of resistance. Check kindly within yourself and see what that’s all about. Then ask yourself, “what am I gaining by holding onto this thought that’s causing me so much suffering?” There’s always a payoff, even if it’s a dysfunctional or unhealthy one. Sometimes the process of letting go is hard, really hard. And that’s why people like me make a career out of helping others release the suffering.

If you’d like help navigating through the math, contact me, I’m safely online at Mindsatpeace.net.

Since you can’t embrace anyone else right now, embrace the suck. And when you put your mask on, don’t forget your cape!

ADDENDUM 6/19/2020

Some people might be saying, “sounds good, but does this really work?”.

Let me tell you about a client I’ll call Jeremy. He originally came to me because he wanted to stop drinking— 3 hangovers a week was having a significant impact on emotional and physical health. A few months into treatment, COVID-19 forced him to close down his business. Now going on over 3 months with no certainty on when he can safely reopen and be profitable.

Instead of succumbing to depression, anxiety or despair, Jeremy found his superpowers. Today he told me that he has grown more, is happier and more excited than he was before COVID shut everything down in March.

He learned to embrace the suck and keep going. Jeremy said, “Business doesn’t control me, I control me.” That’s using superpower.

Want help in achieving that kind of success? Contact me today and find out how to achieve your peace of mind even in the midst of life’s storms.

DRUG AND ALCOHOL ABUSE ON THE RISE, WHILE MENTAL HEALTH GETS WORSE

Updated 10/27/2020

I’m sure this is not a shock to anyone but since the pandemic began, drug and alcohol abuse and mental health problems have significantly increased.

• Positive tests for Fentanyl, heroin, opioids have significant increases in the first two months of the pandemic

• Since the pandemic began, more than 40 states have recorded increases in opioid-related deaths, according to the American Medical Association. 

• The number of opioid-related deaths are on track to be even higher this year

• 62% of Americans more anxious now vs. this time last year.

• Alcohol sales have significantly increased.

• A study published in September found an increase in frequency and consumption of alcohol for both men and women.

• University students showed higher rates of suicidal thoughts, severe distress, sever depression and anxiety.

• Nearly 25% of Americans are experiencing symptoms of depression—3x the number before Covid-19.

• These problems are getting worse, and expected to increase during the winter.

HELP FOR FAMILIES IN ADDICTION

And hey, join me for a free weekly online mindfulness stress reduction class. Register here.